Last night, I had a chat with an amazing friend. She is not only completely grounded and inspirational, but she also sees me. That alone is invaluable.
Among other things, we discussed my ongoing awakening to my animal spirit*, the Hawk.
*Before I lose those who don't get animal spirits or feel it is a bit too whoo-woo, just think of it this way: There is something that keeps showing up in my life and it does so repeatedly and in frequently unexplainable situations. It is odd enough that I am paying attention. Sound fair?
Image from: http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.thelensflare.com/large/hawk_22928.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.thelensflare.com/gallery/p_hawk_22928.php&usg=__7QU9XXTMUoWAyBW33rsBYr0dMnU=&h=389&w=500&sz=63&hl=en&start=0&zoom=1&tbnid=PhUjCExJlnjGLM:&tbnh=128&tbnw=162&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dhawk%2Bphotos%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DX%26biw%3D1247%26bih%3D633%26tbs%3Disch:10,27&um=1&itbs=1&iact=hc&vpx=130&vpy=354&dur=402&hovh=142&hovw=183&tx=116&ty=180&ei=lJocTdb1LoymnAfy5MHNDQ&oei=lJocTdb1LoymnAfy5MHNDQ&esq=1&page=1&ndsp=23&ved=1t:429,r:15,s:0&biw=1247&bih=633
I've done a lot of looking into the meaning of the Hawk and have focused on the "seeing the bigger picture" aspect.
During our conversation, my brilliant friend focused on the fact that the Hawk is a "messenger". That perhaps this is to what I am supposed to listen: I am to be a messenger. I talk frequently about this...feeling that I innately understand "out-there" things, concepts that may be elusive to others. Concepts that are crucial to awakened, peaceful living. Concepts that are generally ignored in the plight of mundane living. I'm also not willing to fly away to a mountain-top (yet) and meditate on these for years.
So perhaps I am to be the messenger here and now, to share that which (I and) others need, to do so in the muck of the real world.
This alone wasn't that new, but the other aspect she brought up - that perhaps I am afraid to do this - was like a punch in the gut. A pleasant one, if there can be such a thing.
The fear that I don't understand the message well enough to share it. The fear that I won't share it in an appropriate manner and the message will get lost in translation. The fear that I'll get too preachy. The fear that I won't get preachy enough and will just be a soft self-help guru while the true depth of message lies untapped and unheard.
I am continuing to be with this, knowing this is where today, tomorrow (and 2011, if I want to think in those terms) is taking me. I know that those of you who read this need what I have to say in some form or fashion (be it about my personal story or other), and that i need to hear you just as much.
I am hurrying this post as life scurrys on around me - hubby & kids are ready to leave. Time (and to-do's) march on.
But moving into who I am, I knew I had to share this message first.
(Please share: Is there anything you've heard recently - with ears or otherwise - that is calling you to listen??)